Friday, December 14, 2007

Mummy: The Pestering™

If I'm sitting at the computer or on the sofa reading, on the whole Ewok leaves me be and plays with his toys. I may be asked to participate in playing but that's about the extent of it. However, should I dare to lie down on the sofa for a rest....

Let slip the babies of pestering, the games are afoot.

The aim of Mummy: The Pestering™: Score as many points as possible before the game ends. The game ends when Mummy gives up trying to rest and gets up from the sofa. Thus the game is a careful balance of pestering just enough to gain maximum points, without over-pestering and bringing the game to an early end.

Rules: There are no rules, anything goes.

Scoring: Points are awarded as follows

Body shots
Any sharp poke to the anatomy scores 2 points. Players may utilise fingers, toes, knees or elbows. Specific shots score as follows:
Ribs - 5 points
Stomach - 10 points
Throat - 20 points
Kidneys - 50 points

Head shots
Finger in ear - 1 point.
Finger in mouth - 2 points.
Finger in eye - 5 points.
Finger up nose - 10 points.
If the finger is slobbery - extra 5 points.
Face slap (anywhere except the nose) - 5 points.
Nose slap - 10 points.

Fancy stuff
Sitting pretty: Climb up and sit on Mummy for a minimum of 10 seconds - 10 points.
Gerrofff: Sit on Mummy's head for a minimum of 10 seconds - 50 points.
Oh you foul creature: Fart while sitting on Mummy's head: 500 points.
Straight: Make a run from one end of the sofa to the other without Mummy throwing you off - 10 points.
Home run: Immediately make a successful return trip - a further 20 points.

Bringing toys into the game adds a whole new dimension. This is not for the novice player.
Hitting Mummy with a toy - 5 points.
Hitting Mummy in the head with a toy - 25 points.
Balancing a toy on Mummy for at least 10 seconds - 5 points.
Subsequent balanced toys gain you a points multiplier equal to the number of toys. E.g. you succeed in balancing 4 toys on Mummy for a minimum of 10 seconds. Score 5 points per toy, 4 toys x 5 points = 20 points, multiplied by 4, for a total of 80 points.

Mummy fights back
Mummy lobs you off the sofa - lose 5 points.
Mummy pins you down for a minimum of 10 seconds - lose 10 points.
Mummy grabs you and tickles - lose 20 points.
Mummy yells for Daddy to come and save her - game over and lose 100 points.

Optional point scoring
If Mummy is poorly then all 'Mummy Fights Back' points are doubled.
False sense of security: If you refrain from attacking Mummy for up to a maximum of five minutes (after this you are deemed to have quit the game) and she thinks you have given up and starts to relax, the points for your next five attacks are doubled.

Ewok was playing this yesterday and by my reckoning he scored 1472 points *urgh*